The Neverending Gardener

If you’d like to try your hand at the gardener’s song, just fill out the empty boxes below. Don’t worry about making sense. Lewis Carroll didn’t! Sometimes he went for sense, sometimes he went for nonsense.

  1. He looked again, and found it was

    • He thought he saw a butterfly
    • that flew among the spires.
    • He looked again, and found it was
    • a tangle of television wires.
    • “If I had a bucket”, he said,
    • “There'd be no need for fires.”

    —Jerry S.

    • He thought he saw a caterpillar
    • sitting on a lonely branch.
    • He looked again, and found it was
    • a butterfly of green and blue and red.
    • “I should have known”, he said,
    • “may this life be the best one yet.”

    —kjb

    • He thought he saw clear blue sky
    • filled with dark black clouds.
    • He looked again, and found it was
    • a piece of cherry pie.
    • “If I only had a spoon”, he said,
    • “I would feed it to a fly.”

    —kix2

    • He thought he saw a bouncing ball
    • hopping down the stair.
    • He looked again, and found it was
    • his son in women's underwear.
    • “I wish the darn hairdresser”, he said,
    • “would stop pulling on my hair!”

    —Stephanie R.

    • He thought he saw a cookie jar
    • that spilled into his lap.
    • He looked again, and found it was
    • an ancient tiger trap.
    • “If I were trapped inside”, he said,
    • “I'd need a better map!”

    —Yuval

    • He thought he saw a Sunset Fire
    • that cut the midnight sky.
    • He looked again, and found it was
    • an Acorn in his eye.
    • “A dreadful bit of luck”, he said,
    • “I'll get a nasty stye.”

    —Steve

    • He thought he saw a grinning cat
    • sitting in a tree
    • He looked again, and found it was
    • a man named Tweedle-Dee.
    • “If I looked again”, he said,
    • “A red queen there might be!”

    —Jess

    • He thought he saw a raindrop
    • that was falling from the sky.
    • He looked again, and found it was
    • a very enormous guy.
    • “To keep this man from eating me”, he said,
    • “I'll fetch him a blueberry pie.”

    —Jo- *XCTuffGirl

    • He thought he saw an albatross,
    • a-weighing at his neck.
    • He looked again, and found it was
    • a pickled pepper peck.
    • “If I were not so starv'd”, he said,
    • “I'd throw it on the deck.”

    —Projoy

    • He thought he saw an octopus
    • with one too many arms.
    • He looked again, and found it was
    • a friend of many charms.
    • “I would invite you home”, he said,
    • “but you would cause me harm.”

    —Jacob K. (Dove_don@yahoo.com)

    • He thought he saw a Hatter's shop
    • that grew out of the sea.
    • He looked again, and found it was
    • a puddle made of tea!
    • “It frightens me, this thing”, he said,
    • “and now I think I'll flee!”

    —Mainecoon Poet the First

    • He thought he saw a Pteradon
    • upon his Uncle's knees.
    • He looked again, and found it was
    • a Llama nibbling cheese.
    • “I would invite you home”, he said,
    • “But your hat's filled with fleas.”

    —kefkatower@aol.com

    • He thought he saw a spiderweb
    • that floated in the air.
    • He looked again, and found it was
    • a tangle in his hair.
    • “If I could use a comb”, he said,
    • “for what could I prepare!”

    —Jerry, on January 19th, 2000 at 11:05 am

    • He thought he saw a billy goat
    • across the great divide.
    • He looked again, and found it was
    • a laminated slide.
    • “A kid on that could die”, he said,
    • “I'll take it for a ride.”

    —Goombah, on September 9th, 2000 at 4:06 am

    • He thought he saw a monkey
    • eating a banana
    • He looked again, and found it was
    • an elephant
    • “Wow”, he said,
    • “maybe he'll give me a ride”

    —AMJ, on January 30th, 2001 at 12:08 pm

    • He thought he saw a printledon
    • demangered in the lob
    • He looked again, and found it was
    • just Laura, Rose and Rob
    • “Decaphth Muldoon”, he said,
    • “om poot dee slipter doope dob!”

    —zack, on June 7th, 2001 at 11:25 pm

    • He thought he saw Inn-Spectre's Ghost
    • that climbed to highest heights
    • He looked again, and found it was
    • An-Alice-Sis of frights
    • “If Snarks could scratch and biteff”, he said,
    • “I'd dream of more delights.”

    —Jay Are N. Dan'l Carroll Fan C, on September 23rd, 2001 at 2:00 pm

    • He thought he saw a bit of sense
    • within the Congress Hall
    • He looked again, and found it was
    • the tax code, written small
    • “A hope so vain”, he grimly said,
    • “diminishes us all!”

    —AWF, on December 1st, 2001 at 7:16 pm

    • He thought he saw utopia
    • a-gleaming on a cloud
    • He looked again, and found it was
    • a very noisy crowd
    • “if I can calm them down”, he said,
    • “I'll feel extremely proud”

    —Jenny, on December 29th, 2001 at 4:02 am

    • He thought he saw old Banquo's ghost
    • A pacing round the room
    • He looked again, and found it was
    • An Economic Boom
    • “Hurray, my wait is o'er”, he said,
    • “Now I can buy a broom!”

    —Chris O, on December 30th, 2001 at 11:49 pm

    • He thought he saw a sign that read,
    • "No parking, 4-6 PM"
    • He looked again, and found it was
    • A Donizetti Requiem
    • “It makes no diff'rence, dear”, he said,
    • “I shall just go and empty them”

    —Chris O, on December 31st, 2001 at 12:03 am

    • He thought he saw the history of the Eastern nat
    • And adjoining the southern islands of Australia and New Zeal
    • He looked again, and found it was
    • A gothic tale rich in romance, mystery, and intrigue
    • “Nobody knows the trouble I've seen, nobody knows m”, he said,
    • “Now is the time for all good men to come to the aid of their”

    —Chris O, on December 31st, 2001 at 12:06 am

    • He thought he saw an arquebus
    • that sang a bawdy song
    • He looked again, and found it was
    • an ancient Chinese gong
    • “If it were up to me”, he said,
    • “I'd think of some good rhyme”

    —David C., on January 15th, 2002 at 1:30 pm

    • He thought he saw a baboon
    • eating a banana with a spoon
    • He looked again, and found it was
    • a great big tractor on the loo
    • “i like 1971”, it said,
    • “because of the agar jelly”

    —Marc+Matt+Barney+Martin+Mark, on January 25th, 2002 at 8:16 am

    • He thought he saw no!
    • Actually no!
    • He looked again, and found it was
    • infact . . no!
    • “NOOOOOOH!”, it said,
    • “Have a Noooooble No time in no land”

    —Marc+Matt+Barney+Martin+Mark, on January 25th, 2002 at 8:17 am

    • He thought he saw a heart on fire
    • that cried for water
    • He looked again, and found it was
    • a red satin lamp
    • “this is not a heart”, he said,
    • “and cried loader and loader”

    —hsteners@chello.no, on March 21st, 2002 at 10:06 am

    • He thought he saw a formula
    • for turning lead to gold
    • He looked again, and found it was
    • a Playboy centerfold
    • “If only this were real”, he said,
    • “I never would grow old”

    —NickM, on March 27th, 2002 at 2:21 am

    • He thought he saw reality
    • and fed it blood each day
    • He looked again, and found it was
    • an illusion in the way
    • “Let's drop this fetid lie”, he said,
    • “we all should live and play!”

    —Brando Peter, on May 13th, 2002 at 2:35 am

    • He thought he saw a kangaroo
    • a-bounding on the plain
    • He looked again, and found it was
    • the Indian-Pacific train
    • “This outback home-brew, mate”, he said,
    • “It drives a bloke insane!”

    —Mykro (mykro@NOseladorSPAM.com, on May 15th, 2002 at 1:29 am

    • He thought he saw a game console
    • With six thousand Megahertz!
    • He looked again, and found it was
    • just Microsoft adverts.
    • “Belay all hope again”, he said,
    • “The truth, it really hurts!”

    —Mykro (mykro@NOseladorSPAM.com, on May 15th, 2002 at 1:47 am

    • He thought he saw a beautiful jungle
    • filled with rivers and tales untold
    • He looked again, and found it was
    • a country of the third world.
    • “as a citizen of the empire”, he said,
    • “I shall buy this land for gold”

    —Joel- joelsonseca@zipmail.com., on August 24th, 2002 at 4:57 pm

    • He thought he saw between the moat,
    • An ancient dieing grange
    • He looked again, and found it was
    • just A minor note
    • “Or maybe in this life”, he sighed,
    • “It's not about the change”

    —viv {llveve at yahoo.com}, on September 27th, 2002 at 1:17 am

    • He thought he saw a pig
    • that was actually a squid
    • He looked again, and found it was
    • a lizard
    • “A Lizard?”, he said,
    • “Whats That There For”

    —ME!, on October 11th, 2002 at 7:38 am

    • He thought he saw an interactive poem
    • with perfect, verse, metric and time
    • He looked again, and found it was
    • some people who could barely rhyme
    • “since they are all so awful”, he said,
    • “it won't hurt if I try.”

    —L1f3t4k3r, on November 6th, 2002 at 10:47 am

    • He thought he saw a superhero
    • that falls over a mountain
    • He looked again, and found it was
    • his sister climbing a tree
    • “I'm here to look”, she said,
    • “to look where he fall”

    —Cimarron, on March 26th, 2003 at 1:22 pm

    • He thought he saw a little white rabbit
    • who was looking at the time
    • He looked again, and found it was
    • a moldy slice of lime
    • “Twas obvious”, he said, at last
    • “it was a silent as a mime.”

    —Marcia, on June 23rd, 2003 at 11:03 pm

    • He thought he saw a small brown bear
    • dressed in a bunny suit
    • He looked again, and found it was
    • his aunt logged in as root
    • “if she did learn vi”, he said,
    • “she must be a daft coot”

    —jellifun, on September 1st, 2003 at 11:20 am

    • He thought he saw the rising sun,
    • bringing in tomorrow
    • He looked again, and found it was
    • a dream he couldn't follow
    • “it was only love”, he said,
    • “or some other kind of sorrow”

    —pope gregory the ninth, on September 1st, 2003 at 10:53 pm

    • He thought he saw a bandersnatch
    • a sittin' on a rake
    • He looked again, and found it was
    • poor Alice eating cake
    • “The tea is welly weak”, he said,
    • “So brandish me a rake!”

    —bruno, on October 1st, 2003 at 2:32 pm

    • He thought he saw a boojum
    • dancing with a bear
    • He looked again, and found it was
    • a rhino on a chair
    • “Leave my den at once!”, he said,
    • “The neighbors will all stare!”

    —bruno, on October 1st, 2003 at 2:37 pm

    • He thought he saw a pocketwatch
    • that ran on borrowed time
    • He looked again, and found it was
    • a sombre painted mime
    • “What a perfect day”, he said,
    • “for morning bells to chime!”

    —studio@n-heptane.com, on October 6th, 2003 at 12:13 am

    • He thought he saw a caterpillar
    • reclining on a branch
    • He looked again, and found it was
    • a pixie in a trance
    • “for one my size”, he said,
    • “I'll give her another glance”

    —eva, on October 18th, 2003 at 1:50 pm

    • He thought he saw a Red-throat Diver
    • Floating to the Moon:
    • He looked again, and found it was
    • A Silly Silver Sliver.
    • “Were I to question this”, he said,
    • “I'd go crazy as a Loon.”

    —bakker@itc.nl, on December 5th, 2003 at 4:33 am

    • He thought he saw a Document
    • Waiting to be stored:
    • He looked again, and found it was
    • An Old Motherboard.
    • “Should this thing run again”, he said,
    • “Mars could be explored.”

    —bakker@itc.nl, on December 5th, 2003 at 5:36 am

    • He thought he saw a whatcha call it
    • looming in the fog.
    • He looked again, and found it was
    • that bagwort, Bob the Dog.
    • “It's just like that, Odd Og”, he said,
    • “half turle and half frog.”

    —Svato El Gato, on December 10th, 2003 at 8:47 pm

    • He thought he saw a bald bear
    • doing yoga
    • He looked again, and found it was
    • a bald man
    • “working onthe roof”, he said,
    • “oops, i must be mistaken”

    —ytak, on February 29th, 2004 at 5:14 pm

    • He thought he saw a mermaid
    • sitting on a rock
    • He looked again, and found it was
    • a very old frock
    • “oh my !”, he said,
    • “how very strange it is so vr'y y'c”

    —Loren Hardy, on April 5th, 2004 at 2:11 pm

    • He thought he saw a child's dream
    • of fantasy and madness
    • He looked again, and found it was
    • a refuge from the sadness
    • “Please don't wake me up”, he said,
    • “My heart is filled with gladness”

    —sherikhalil@hotmail.com, on May 26th, 2004 at 2:15 am

    • He thought he saw his grandmama
    • sitting in the field waiting summah
    • He looked again, and found it was
    • the old friend ex-drug dilah
    • “What teh fuck”, he said,
    • “stop fuckin around you fuckah”

    —Bloody Dahn, on June 2nd, 2004 at 2:03 pm

    • He thought he saw an ambulance
    • that moulded like a cheese
    • He looked again, and found it was
    • a never-ending sneeze
    • “By Aunt Gloria's beard”, he said,
    • “that dog's in want of fleas”

    —BobS, on June 18th, 2004 at 3:50 pm

    • He thought he saw an Antelope
    • That left behind its feet
    • He looked again, and found it was
    • A murky cloud of sleet
    • “If I were living still”, he said,
    • “I'd send it up the street.”

    —no one, on July 28th, 2004 at 4:39 pm

    • He thought he saw a Marmoset
    • That sat upon a Toad
    • He looked again, and found it was
    • A slight dip in the road
    • “If I had me some rice”, he said,
    • “I'd make sure it was mowed”

    —wrote, on July 28th, 2004 at 4:43 pm

    • He thought he saw a Roman road
    • That ran straight, straight-a-way
    • He looked again, and found it was
    • the twenty-ninth of May
    • “And all the miles”, at journey's end,
    • “Will come to me this day”

    —Bruce, on August 2nd, 2004 at 10:31 pm

    • He thought he saw a cricket team
    • A'striding to the wicket,
    • He looked again, and found it was
    • A ram caught in the thicket.
    • “The sacrifice of life”, he said,
    • “Is nearly worth the ticket!”

    —Bruce, on August 5th, 2004 at 12:03 am

    • He thought he saw a water tank
    • A-standing in the rain:
    • He looked again, and found it was
    • A coloured map of Spain.
    • “And all the ink”, and all that work,
    • “Is washing down the drain”

    —Bruce., on August 23rd, 2004 at 11:50 pm

    • He thought he saw a hungry man
    • who gave to him some food
    • He looked again, and found it was
    • a bird who acted lude
    • “farwell”, he said,
    • “you've eaten my greater half”

    —msully@twcny.rr.com, on October 24th, 2004 at 4:05 pm

    • He thought he saw a hungry man
    • wh gave to him some food
    • He looked again, and found it was
    • a bird who acted rude
    • “dont eat me”, he said,
    • “you've eaten my greater half”

    —msully@twcny.rr.com, on October 24th, 2004 at 4:17 pm

    • He thought he saw A blood-red stone
    • crying on the ground.
    • He looked again, and found it was
    • a new animal, yet to be found.
    • “I will name this”, he said,
    • “The Beomitone.”

    —metsys, on December 3rd, 2004 at 11:38 pm

    • He thought he saw a coconut
    • Among the hedgeroe trees
    • He looked again, and found it was
    • A song in seven keys
    • “Were I in charge of this”, he said,
    • “The music would be free!”

    —John O, on December 31st, 2004 at 5:14 pm

    • He thought he saw a wise old nun
    • Of whom to be leery.
    • He looked again, and found it was
    • Pythagoras' theory.
    • “If I were to claim this”, he said,
    • “There would be enquiries.”

    —John O, on December 31st, 2004 at 5:31 pm

    • He thought he saw an Oxford don
    • who wrote a children's book.
    • He looked again, and found it was
    • the grandson of a Took.
    • “if Alice had the Ring”, he said,
    • “Where would the Eye then look?”

    —Estelyn Telcontar, on January 14th, 2005 at 5:04 am

    • He thought he saw an auctioneer
    • who shook the highest bid
    • He looked again, and found it was
    • a many fingered squid
    • “jugulars are fine”, he said,
    • “gymnastics for your id”

    —Ramsey Forbush, on March 12th, 2005 at 11:43 pm

    • He thought he saw a naked woman
    • naked as the day she was born
    • He looked again, and found it was
    • nothing but an old french horn
    • “If I had my eyes checked”, he said,
    • “I would see less porn”

    —Garry v., on September 19th, 2005 at 3:27 pm

    • He thought he saw Alice
    • a sittin' on a tree
    • He looked again, and found it was
    • an oyster around the sea
    • “If the walrus find me”, he said,
    • “I will no longer be!”

    —Wendel, on December 27th, 2005 at 10:00 pm

    • He thought he saw love in the air
    • floating freely for all to see
    • He looked again, and found it was
    • a misty mess without a key
    • “To unlock the love I feel”, he said,
    • “Would show the girl for her I'm real”

    —Amy, on February 3rd, 2006 at 3:49 pm

    • He thought he saw a great, green lizard
    • dangling from a string
    • He looked again, and found it was
    • a blackened orchid sting
    • “Look at the violet sky”, he said,
    • “and pull it through my ring”

    —Violet Scripkus, on February 8th, 2006 at 12:01 am

    • He thought he saw the truth
    • showering with glee
    • He looked again, and found it was
    • an empty telling lie
    • “Surely I should find my head”, he said,
    • “and come back down to reality.”

    —Kali C, on March 16th, 2006 at 12:41 am

    • He thought he saw a treacle well
    • beside the mossy glade.
    • He looked again, and found it was
    • a jar of marmelaide.
    • “A rabbit hole, it seems”, he said,
    • “Is where this item laid.”

    —Ecliptic Hellflower, on April 12th, 2006 at 5:33 pm

    • He thought he saw a picture
    • that was hanging on the wall
    • He looked again, and found it was
    • a playpen filled with balls
    • “If I were a woman”, he said,
    • “I'd quickly, in there, fall.”

    —Donnabeth89@hotmail.com, on June 17th, 2006 at 12:52 pm

    • He thought he saw A Bird
    • Pointing a Gun.
    • He looked again, and found it was
    • The Death Himself.
    • “You'll sure take some Tea”, he said,
    • “Before you take my Soul.”

    —Etienne, on January 22nd, 2007 at 11:42 am

    • He thought he saw a little bird
    • that stood upon a tree
    • He looked again, and found it was
    • his bachelor's degree
    • “Now I've lost my mind”he said,
    • “this cannot be for me!”

    —mj.hayhow@btinternet.com, on June 18th, 2007 at 4:17 pm

    • He thought he saw a friend of his
    • with ears of bright green bread
    • He looked again, and found it was
    • an elephant in bed
    • “its memory is great”, he said,
    • “for when my PC's dead”

    —jellifun, on January 10th, 2008 at 9:38 am

    • He thought he saw a magazine
    • that verified the lies
    • He looked again, and found it was
    • the clouds eating the skies.
    • “They don't tell the truth”, he said,
    • “I can see it in their eyes.”

    —G. M. Oney, on February 7th, 2008 at 11:58 pm

    • He thought he saw a question mark
    • that knew exactly what to say.
    • He looked again, and found it was
    • exclamation meant to stay.
    • “Yesterday may say”, he said,
    • “Tomorrow is Today?”

    —G. M. Oney, on February 8th, 2008 at 12:04 am

    • He thought he saw a little girl
    • in her hair a golden curl
    • He looked again, and found it was
    • his wife wearing polished pearls
    • “Noooooooooooo!”, He screamed,
    • “You are evil Shirls!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”

    —Ray Gun, on May 21st, 2008 at 7:07 pm

    • He thought he saw me emailing
    • this neverending song
    • He looked again, and found it was
    • a double noselength long
    • “Literarilly impossible”, he said,
    • “Neverending is this long?”

    —stuurlauraeenuil@yahoo.com, on January 5th, 2009 at 3:53 am

    • He thought he saw a lizard
    • bouncing up and down
    • He looked again, and found it was
    • in fact humping a bee
    • “why in all my days”, he said,
    • “have i ever seen such a thing!”

    —gggkinc, on October 30th, 2009 at 6:10 pm

    • He thought he saw a turtleneck
    • upon the tiger's back.
    • He looked again, and found it was
    • a spongey cream-filled snack.
    • “Wherever that came from”, he said,
    • “I think I'll take a pack.”

    —Jerry S., on March 22nd, 2010 at 5:54 pm

    • He thought he saw a flying Gaul
    • with sword and helm and spear.
    • He looked again, and found it was
    • a hammer made of beer.
    • “If I only had a nail”, he said,
    • “I’d besot myself in fear.”

    —Jerry S., on January 11th, 2012 at 7:10 am

    • He thought he saw a Crockery-Pot
    • That smoldered on a spire:
    • He looked again, and found it was
    • A Brightly Painted Tire.
    • “Man’s aesthetic sense”, he said,
    • “Is growing rather dire!”

    —Polaris, on April 16th, 2017 at 7:09 pm