From: [g--e--r] at [utdallas.edu] (Dale M. Greer) Newsgroups: alt.drugs,talk.politics.drugs Subject: Cop Fails Piss Test; Blames Bagel Dogs Date: 28 Mar 1994 15:32:27 GMT I was going to type this in from home, but my computer's on the blink, so I'll have to summarize from memory. I'll repost this in more detail when my computer is well again. A policeman in Dallas spent two sleepless nights worrying about his future on the force after traces of morphine showed up in his urine. His wife finally remembered he had come home late that night, and on such occasions he usually downs a few Bagel Dogs in lieu of dinner. The officer was cleared of suspiscion after it was determined that the poppy seeds on the bagels were responsible for the "spurious" morphine reading. The officer didn't blame the system, just the doctor in charge of the test. However, he did say that it bothered him that he was "presumed guilty before being proved innocent." The International Buy A Clue Foundation (tm) will be taking donations for the officer in question, as well as for other members of the Dallas Police who are clue-challenged, clue-impaired, and terminally clueless. Just call 1-800-NOT-A-CLUE and have your credit card ready. -- Dale Greer, [g--e--r] at [utdallas.edu] "They know that it is human nature to take up causes whereby a man may oppress his neighbor, no matter how unjustly. ... Hence they have had no trouble in finding men who would preach the damnability and heresy of the new doctrine from the very pulpit..." - Galileo Galilei, 1615