Grateful Words

Its all over now

From: Connie Szeflinski <[c--nn--e] at []>
Date: Wed, 09 Aug 95 15:54:07 GMT
Organization: Cosmic Communications

You know, i didn't catch all 30... but i was just 17 at my first show, and now i'm 45... I was captivated by Jerry's guitar for well over half of my life, i'm gonna miss him, as i'm sure we all will.

take care, connie

So Long, Jerry

From: David Lynch <[e--er--d] at []>
Organization: IgLou Internet Services
Date: Thu, 10 Aug 1995 22:21:31 GMT

The Courier-Journal said you were "Yoda-like" today. Whatever. Thanks for the music.

[e--er--d] at []

The Day the Music Died

From: lLispalyo <[l--pa--o] at []>
Date: 9 Aug 1995 12:40:29 -0400
Organization: America Online, Inc. (1-800-827-6364)

The term has been used before...but this isn't the Big Bopper. Today is the Day the Music Died. I am a newbie to the Greatful Dead. I got turned on to their music in college - by my boyfriend. I tried to go to their Pittsburgh show this year and couldn't but figured there would be next year. And now I know that will never happen. I was only 10 when Lennon was killed, but I remember where I was when I heard. I was deeply saddened by his passing and I am equally saddened by Jerry's. A beautiful sound has left us - but we'll all be jammin when we get to the other side. Peace to you all - thanks for lettin me chat.


From: Mike Behrend <[m c beh] at []>
Date: 9 Aug 1995 17:23:23 GMT
Organization: PGI Ink

So long old friend. I love you more than words can tell.


From: Joel Frank <[j f rank] at []>
Date: Wed, 9 Aug 1995 23:25:28 -0400
Organization: Albert Einstein College of Medicine

This is my first entry on the internet or bulletin board or whatever this is. I heard about Jerry earlier today and I am suprised there is nothing on this yet. remember the music never stops. If anyone wants to write about the loss I will reply. My first show was at Springfield in 78. Englishtown, Rochester, Syracuse, Nassau, Madison Square Garden, Radio City, Meadowlands, Utica, SPAC, Phili, I didn't travel to far but had some great times. I have tapes back to 66 so I can still listen. There is suppose to be a vigil at Central Park in NY and Bob, Phil, Mickey, Bill and vince will possibly be there. Any more info let me know at [j f rank] at [] This is my first posting so I think that this is my address - i'm not sure?

Jerry thanks for the best times I ever had!

From: Lisa Blasco <[H X TJ 50 A] at []>
Date: 9 Aug 1995 17:24:28 GMT
Organization: Prodigy Services Company 1-800-PRODIGY

Wishing you peace, light, and love! You have touched the hearts of many! I was so looking forward to the upcoming shows just to feel the magic, a little peace, a chance to release. Well you said it: "What a long strange trip it's been." The Dead will live on in all of our hearts, we will dance in our cars, reminise with friends, turn the stereos up high, for you Jerry , "We will get by." Good by friend, we love you........

(no subject)

From: Robert Underwood <[r--u] at []>
Date: 9 Aug 1995 23:46:41 GMT Organization: Totsukawa High School

I woke up to a beautiful morning here in Yoshino mountains in a rural, forgotten area of Japan. I was half asleep, enjoying the fact that I had nothing to do but cherish a beatiful day.

And then my aunt called. From America. And I heard. It was so wierd to be so far away from it all, knowing all the vigils that would be going on tonight, that I would have been at the Bob Wier show tonight in Hampton Beach, New Hampshire had I been home tonight.

But somehow, as the morning groginess leaves, I realize that an important part of Jerry's music was the way it brought people together, however far apart they were.

I wish I was in the US right now, but a bunch of us ex-pats here will get together tonite and say goodbye from this corner of the world to someone who touched every corner of the world...

Thanks Jerry

Rob Underwood

Jerry: "I'll miss you man..."

From: dachner <[d--h--r] at []>
Date: 9 Aug 1995 20:08:31 GMT

When I was 19 years old, I was humping the bush in Vietnam, and drawn onto the canvas cover of my helmet was a peace symbol and in big, block letters, the words: GRATEFUL DEAD.

The sun was hot, and the dust was everywhere...but a few things got me through it all and the GD kept me going all those days back then and through all the years since...thanks Jerry...your music is a woven piece in my life's fabric.

Goodbye Jerry

From: Todd Gilbert <[tod d g] at []>
Date: Thu, 10 Aug 1995 04:39:40 GMT

It seems you grabbed my cerebral cortex and propelled it to dimensions unknown with every note as it glided and fell upon the next. At 5 years old I heard Dark Star and felt a knowledge beyond my parents. At 7 Scarlet Begonias cultivated that tingle along the spine that only a few of us know. My first show at age 13 blessed the rest of my life.

We love you Jerry!

I will get by

From: Matthew <[m l batz] at []>
Date: Wed, 9 Aug 1995 22:45:02 GMT
Organization: Illinois State University


Not enough fond memories. I wish I met you sooner.


deapest condolances

From: Bert <[R--SD--L] at []>
Date: 10 Aug 1995 05:32:05 GMT
Organization: Berkeley dead-flames to USENET Gateway

I loved Jerry and I still love the grateful dead!

Please keep playing!!!!


Jerry's Passing

From: Laurence W. Davidson <[l--i--n] at []>
Date: 9 Aug 1995 20:10:05 GMT
Organization: TLGnet, a division of RGNet, Inc.

For all the years and tears of joy and sadness, I don't think I can ever remember a day where I felt so empty inside. Since one of my oldest friends turned me onto the dead in 73 I have been inspired by Jerry almost daily - his playing and heartfelt singing will be missed for all time.........

Don't ever let the memory of Jerry fade my friends - he was a truly gifted musician who allowed each and every oen of us a glimpse into his soul with every note he played.....

{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{}}}}}}}}}}}}} >o< Hugs and kisses to you Jerry - I'll be blasting Noe Valley tonight!!!!


Thanks Jerry

From: WMOITMD <[wmoit m d] at []>
Date: 9 Aug 1995 13:18:38 -0400
Organization: America Online, Inc. (1-800-827-6364)

I haven't been on the bus very long, but the last 5 years have been wonderful. Thanks for the trip Jerry.

peace all,

Douglas Dodge

I won't slave for beggar's pay,
likewise gold and jewels.
But I would slave to find a way
to sink your Ship of Fools.

Oh My God....

From: Christy L. Cochran <[c l c] at []>
Date: 9 Aug 1995 16:18:28 GMT

I think this is what people mean when they can recall exactly what they were doing when John Kennedy or John Lennon was shot. I give my extreme condolences to everyone that is affected by this misfortune and remember that everything will be okay in the end. Please everyone take care! Jerry is probably happier now than before...

Take Care and Peace to all!


"Where does the time go?" - Uncle John's Band

We Love you Jerry

From: John Wilson <[j--w--s] at []>
Date: 9 Aug 1995 16:18:30 GMT
Organization: North Bay Network, Inc. news server - not responsible for content

Dear Jerry, no one played the guitar like you, thanks for the memories that we will always hold so dear. You took so many to that sacred place, now you're there for good.

We forgive you for your weakness, we all have that somehow.

Your devoted fan.

Jerry's passing.....

From: Royster <[r--y] at []>
Organization: Ripco Internet BBS, Chicago
Date: Wed, 9 Aug 1995 16:37:52 GMT

This morning I got a phone call from a friend telling me of the passing of Jerry reaction was disbelief at first...but then the announcement came on the radio...that Jerry had died this morning...

It is my belief that to truly have a righteous must not just feel the happiness for themselves...but spread it to others also...

Jerry, through his music...touched my heart...I remember when he played "Brokendown Palace"..The song moved me to the tears...I will never forget Jerry and his playing...

Jerry, wherever you are...we love you, and we will never forget you...


Compiling tribute to Jerry - Let the world know you care.

From: Derxt <[der x t] at []>
Date: 10 Aug 1995 02:54:17 -0400

There was a man I never met, And brought me more smiles than any other. Brought me roses when I had none and shored my ruins broken. There never was a sweeter sound than those his muse had spoken.

Where were you?

From: Michael Skidmore <[m s kidmor] at []>
Date: 10 Aug 1995 23:13:24 GMT
Organization: University of California, San Diego

I just flew in the the Bay Area from San Diego to do some research at Livermore and was on the 580 happily speeding when some head called in on KRQR and was really shaken. HE requested Fire and Franklin's. The DJ said thanks and how sad he was that Jerry was gone. Gone I thought? Oh, shit Jerry's dead. It took a while for me to believe it but I recalled the heads tone of voice and knew it had to be true. It was around 11:30am. Right before the call, they were playing the Nation Anthem sung by three tenors that sounded oddly familiar. I stayed on the station to find out what it was and that's when the DJ took the call. He said that was the Dead doing the Anthem for a Giants show a few years back.

It didn't strike me at first, I was sort of blanked out but then during Fire it occured to me that I am never going to hear my favorite sound again. Then the tears started. It's allways been my favorite thing when I haven't been to a show in a while and I hear that guitar start tuning. OH YEAH my mind usually replies.

Even if I go to a show in a crappy mood, or still adrenaline rushed from getting the mic stand up and deck turned on barely in time, that guitar immediately changes my mood. I'm going to miss that first moment at a show more than anythng else.

Heads have been waving at me on the freeway today. It's somehow oddly cosmic that fate brought me back to the Bay area right when all this was happening. It's nice to be able to deal with it here in Dead Central, with all the outpouring of support by Heads and radio stations.

My Shoreline and Devore taper's tickets will probably be in the mail when I get home. Oh well.

I hope somehow we can all keep together as a community either by trading tapes or going to the groups individual projects and other bands like Phish, DMB, et al. It won't be the same of course, but I know we can all stay together somehow.

Guess Jerry is probably happy to see Pigpen again. I wonder if they will meet right away or if he will see other old friends like his father first.

Michael Skidmore UCSD Dept of Pathology

Where were you?

From: June Stacey Cummins <[j s c 5] at []>
Date: 10 Aug 1995 04:51:27 GMT
Organization: Columbia University

I was driving and had a lot of trouble wiping away the tears. My 14-month-old baby, sitting next to me in a carseat, tried to comfort me in his baby way.


On hearing the news...

From: Dale Keiger <[d--k] at []>
Date: 9 Aug 1995 20:46:17 GMT
Organization: Johns Hopkins University

As a 41-year-old geezer, I picked a bad year to finally get into the Dead, didn't I?

Sorry for your loss, folks. Your sense of community moves me a great deal.

Dale Keiger

so very sad

From: Laura Pinkham <[pinkham 1] at []>
Date: Wed, 09 Aug 1995 16:03:22 -0500
Organization: The Ohio State University

Heard the news today from my oldest freind, so very very sad - been hard not to cry at my office job since I heard. Never posted to this group before, but been a deadhead for 11 years and many shows. I'll never forget Jerry, all the joy he brought - just reading all these posts brings tears to my eyes - May he rest in peace, and dance wherever he is. My love and condolences to all who grieve today. I'll miss you Jerry

Ripple in still water, when there is no pebble tossed, nor wind to blow.... let it be known, there is a fountain, that was not filled, by the hand of men.

It's all good

From: Jurgen Fauth <[j--au--h] at []>
Date: 9 Aug 1995 21:36:48 GMT
Organization: In Watermelon Sugar

I've only known for a couple of hours now, which I mostly spent driving through a Mississippi thunderstorm alone, beating the wheel, crying, listening to Morning Dew, and Days Between, Eyes, Standing on the Moon...

I figured I'd get on here and say all kinds of things, but now I don't feel like saying anyting. Death always makes us speechless. All of a sudden, there's nothing left to say.

But then, we need to talk about it. I'm all alone down here, and I wish I was on the West coast, somewhere in San Fransisco... I need to talk.

Someone else on here was saying that he'll stay with us. And it's true. Western culture has a really weird relationship with death; we can't handle it. We don't know what to do with it. So we get angry, and upset. I always thought the name of the band, and us being "Deadheads" had something to do with a joyful acceptance of death, an easier relationship with the unavoidable that let us enjoy life so much more. I mean, we knew all along it would happen, it would happen to Jerry, just as it is gonna happen to me and to you. If anyone's joy and life-affirming soul is going to stay around, then it's Jerry's, who poured more of it into those tapes we have then anyone else. The bulb is shattered, but the light keeps on shining. Every one of us who has ever connected with him, who ever knew, has enough Garcia in them to last a lifetime. Let's not mourn over the shows we're not gonna see this fall, or next year, or the one after--let's be happy about the shows we did see. Let's not be sad that we lost him, let's be grateful that we had him. It all rolls into one, and it's all good.


Life really sux about now.....

From: Michael Smith <[s--i--h] at []>
Date: 9 Aug 1995 21:42:24 GMT
Organization: The will be assimilated....resistance is futile

I was in Kepler's Bookstore last night when this little kid (about 10) started to talk to me about music. He asked me what I listened to, and when I told him I listened to the Dead, his eyes lit up. He told me about how he had saved his allowance from the whole year to mail order for the Shorline shows, which would be his first.

And I thought man, I wish I had been listening to the Dead when I was that young, and that I was really looking forward to the Shoreline, since I hadn't seen a show since 9/13/93......and then to hear this morning that he died, and thinking that it was just another stupid rumor....

The only CD I have with me here at work is One from the Vault, and I just can't listen to it because it has Music Never Stopped on it.

This is a truly, truly, shitty day.

And 90% of the people in this country don't realize that a huge part of what was good about American culture is over.

All I can say is fuck, man.

Thank You for a Real Good Time

From: Vincent Jacques <[j--k--s] at []>
Date: Wed, 09 Aug 1995 15:24:28
Organization: IDS World Network Internet Access Service, (800)IDS-1680

What can you say? You could probably post a million lyrics that are appropriate for this moment. I can't even really believe he's gone. I suppose life goes on. I'm glad he was kind enough to let us experience it with him and allow us to capture the moments with today's technology.

Winterland New year 1969

From: Larry Edwards <[l--r--y] at []>
Date: 10 Aug 1995 06:34:46 GMT
Organization: Data Transfer Group

Great sadness upon hearing the news about Jerry Garcia today. The PBS station is doing a special program of the Dead at Radio Music City Hall in 1980 and people are talking on the air of memories of the dead.

I've been thinking back to my first dead concert - New year's eve 1969 at Winterland in San Francisco. What an incredible experience - a friend told me you just had to see them once in person and you were hooked for life. They came on at midnight and played for four hours straight. At midnight a guy in diapers had come down on a trapeze as the new year baby and, of course, 5 minutes later he was naked and prancing around the stage to Truckin'. Bill Graham was throwing pants at him and telling him to put them on.

THe music was wonderful and they played and kept playing. At 4:00 am, hot tuna came on and jammed with them. It was really something. Finally at 5:30 am, it was over. Ive seen them other places (hollywood bowl, san diego) but Winterland had to be the best ever for me.

I am kind of like an older generation dead head - I've always enjoyed their music because it has so many facets to it. Jery's absence will make a difference but his spirit will live on…


feelin bad...anyone going out to Skipper's tonight in Tampa??????

From: Murphy Hunting <[hun t m] at []>
Date: 10 Aug 1995 12:37:56 GMT
Organization: Baymont Technologies, Inc.

I'm really reelin from the news. I need to be with some dead family tonight. Part of my youth died yesterday with Jerry. Saw my first show in 1989 at the Greek Theatre in Berkley, two days of love and happiness. It was the weekend of my sister's wedding. She and her husband Jay Sherrerd took me there. It's one of the greatest experiences of my life. I've caught them whenever I could on both coasts every year since. I loved him.

Strangers stopping strangers...

From: Eric E. <[76462 3340] at []>
Date: 10 Aug 1995 17:29:30 GMT
Organization: Berkeley dead-flames to USENET Gateway

I was dancing down the street, 3 days dirty, listening to the Scarlet-->Fire (5/8/77) when some chica told me Jerry Garcia was dead. All I said was "no he's not, listen....". We sat there and shared my walkman until the end of a zany Estimated. We hugged, then went our ways. It's beautiful how even in death, Jerry and the Grateful Dead can allow "strangers to stop strangers just to shake their hand." ...or something like that


Thank you Jerry

From: [a--is--r] at [] (Adrian Pfisterer)
Date: Wed, 09 Aug 1995 23:27:21 -0700 (PDT)
Organization: Micron Internet Services

Well I heard the news today when my father called me this morning from NH. What can I say that hasn't been said yet? I loved the man,I loved his music and even after all the bad things that have been said about the scene at shows,I can't think of a place that I would rather be than dancing to his music. All the times that Jerry has put me into a different dimension while dancing, flew before my eyes when I heard the news. I know the vigil that I am about to go to in a half hour here in Boise is going to be hard, it is also going to be good to share my feelings with other bretheren. Peace,Jerry,I love you

Listen to the music play,

Marc Pfisterer

Thank You Jerry

From: [as 403436] at [] (Steve Burnham)
Date: 10 Aug 1995 08:28:53 GMT
Organization: York University, Ontario, Canada

My brother woke me up this morning with a phone call. This is strange since he is a bond trader and never has time to talk. Apparently the news of Jerry's passing was broadcasted over all the trader's screens. When he told me it was if I already knew. A very strange feeling. If only I could have experienced Jerry and his music longer. I'm saddened by the loss for all of us. Good luck Jerry...

Jerry's Dead ?

From: [j--us--o] at [] (Joe Yusko)
Date: 9 Aug 1995 16:20:59 GMT
Organization: Express Access Online Communications, Greenbelt, MD USA

I just heard on the G. Gordon Liddy show that Jerry has died? Say it ain't so. I hope to God that this was a joke in poor tasts, but he's not the kind of person to do something like that. Oh man……..



From: Dave Delacey <[d--l--e] at [PEAK.ORG]>
Date: Wed, 9 Aug 1995 09:12:27 -0700
Organization: CS Outreach Services--PEAK, Corvallis, Oregon, USA

hello? hello? oh my god, am i here all alone? why

Goodbye Jerry...

From: "Doug Farber" <[DFARBER ofcmail] at []>
Date: 10 Aug 1995 09:48:30 GMT
Organization: Berkeley dead-flames to USENET Gateway

Fare thee well Jerry. There is sadness here in Hong Kong. Not many folk here to commiserate with, although Jerry always rocked on Chinese New Year and was a true China Cat. Last night, before I got the news, I dusted off Workingman's. The strains of Black Peter are bitterly ironic

...And its just like any other day that's ever been.

Today is much sadder, There is a little less hope and joy in the world today but this darkness got to give. I wish I could be back in San Francisco sharing Jerry's Magic Memories but its also good to appreciate Jerry on this side of the world to celebrate the influence of a true cultural icon. I'm gonna miss you when your gone...

Doug Farber

Godspeed Jerry

From: [s c m] at [] (Susan Mudgett aka little gator)
Date: 9 Aug 1995 15:35:19 -0400
Organization: gators 'r us

Am I the only one who couldn't feel it enough to cry until I read it here? A friend who works for NPR called while I was napping & left a mgs. I saw it confirmed on CNN and VH1. BUt it wasnt real till I saw the posts.

I think of my Gatorful Dead jacket, showing the Dead of 1986 as gators. Now Jerrygator has to get a halo to match Brentgator's.

I'm flooded with too many memories to name.

All the years combine, they melt into a dream.

In the land of the night..

From: [m--ct--s] at [] (MagicTrees)
Date: 9 Aug 1995 12:36:07 -0400

In the land of the Night the chariot of the Sun is drawn by the Grateful Dead.

Peace and Love to all who will miss him.

Where were you?

From: [j--l--e] at [] (Julie Bennett)
Date: Thu, 10 Aug 1995 08:47:26 +0000
Organization: Nirvana

I was here in London. My little sister called from SF to tell me. I thought it was something with my mom, as it was a strange time to for her to call, peak morning rates and all. She said "have you heard the news?" I said, "No, what, is it mom?" All she said was: "Jerry Garcia died this morning."

I must admit that I was a bit relieved in my moment of panic, but then it hit me, hit me like a ton of bricks. I saw my first show on my 16th birthday in '74, the Sound Test at the Cow Palace. I have seen about 150 shows since. I live in England now, so they are not a big part of my everyday life anymore, but I have caught shows when I've been back home visiting. I saw the Sunday night show at Shoreline in June (has that turned out to be the last one?) and I wasn't that impressed (you know how it is sometimes), but now I will remember it always.

Honestly, I'm in shock. I cried myself to sleep last night. I feel like someone in my family has died.

My house mates here just can't really understand it, I mean it's not like he was a rockstar/idle type that I was in love with, like if I was 14. But I loved him, even got to meet him a couple of times. If there is anyone here in England who would like to chat or get together sometime, I would be pleased to meet some Deadheads around here. I'm going away today for 2-1/2 weeks, but will be back on the 27th.

I don't know what to say, it's the end of an era, the end of the band as we know it, but they will always be in my mind and today Jerry Garcia and all who loved him are in my heart.



From: Dick Allgire <[d--eg--e] at []>
Date: 10 Aug 1995 07:37:04 GMT
Organization: Pacific Information eXchange, Inc.

My dear wife, trying to console me, just said "He went to a better place."

I don't know... I can't think of a better place than a Grateful Dead concert. ;-)

prophet in our time

From: [a--x] at [] (Ark Fox)
Date: Thu, 10 Aug 1995 01:31:44 -0700
Organization: Rumrunners

Just returned from the griffith park vigil (LA). Very mellow scene, but somethin' awfully wrong. felt sick, sick inside and started to cry. last time i cried when my momma died. despite the new void, despite the new post GD world, no more dead shows, no more road tripss to OZ, everywhere, like before, the forest of mike stands, twirlers, and just silly folk , irealized that whithin the immensity of the space-time continuum, of all the times to be on earth, or anywhere in the universe, WE ARE all here, and heard his message. Then joy at how fortunate we all are for we are tuned and discovered and grooved. show after show, year after year, trip after fucking trip. how we grooved! it's like sure he played great music and was the master of tone, but he was tuned into something greater, far more beautiful than we can imagine, and he shared this with us every time, and some of us more tuned to his sound than others, sure. he was the instrument for the harmony of the universe, the transducer of peace and love that rocked our very soul (with phil's help (sf) of course :) and the other seven deities. perhaps the things he saw drove him to be the way he was, perhaps he saw thiungs too unbearable or unbelievable, whatever. in any case, Jerry Garcia was a prophet in our time. for those that have heard his message, that have the sacred tapes, that live the message, to the faithful and the innocent rejoice for we are blessed to have lived in his time. we now bear the sacred task of perpetuating what we have experienced. May your tapes become as multiple as ... digitalize them for jerry's sake, on cd's if you have them so they may last. and perhaps in the post-apocalyptic world, further on down the road, the elders may use them as guides to discover the reincarnation of our beloved jer. in the meantime, do as Bob says and don't dwell. if you get confused..... love, AF.

Thanks for the postings

From: [n--ra--a] at [] (Craig Giffen)
Date: 10 Aug 1995 09:59:05 GMT
Organization: Wolfe Internet Access, L.L.C.

Almost everyone at the restaurant I work at refers to Jerry as "That guy". While at work tonight I found out about a local vigil.I bailed out of work for a couple of hours to go to it. It was nice to sit in a park tonight with 75 people and share our common thoughts & feelings. I returned to work and once the last customer left, I played the Dead very loud over the building's stereo. I changed the reader board from "Try our California Chicken Burger" to "Goodbye Jerry, we'll miss you".

Somehow I think I'll catch hell for this or get they say "If I tried to tell you, you just wouldn't understand" Thanks for the 2 megs of postings. If I can't be in San Francisco now, at least there is the net.

I wished I could be in Golden Gate Park, just someplace where people are gathered. The net has been a good spot.

All of my friends come to see me last nigt...

From: Colin Lamb <[colin lamb] at []>
Date: 10 Aug 1995 15:44:39 GMT
Organization: Dial Computer Center - Drake University

I had just flipped on the my AM radio yesterday to the ABC Radio news and heard the words "biggest hit was Touch of Grey" - and I knew what had happend. Moments later my younger brother Mike called me. He was crying. We had just taken him to the July 8 & 9th shows in Chicago. They were his first.

I had a meeting in the afternoon. Right after which one of my good friends stopped by out of the blue. He wanted to check on me and hang out.

I got together with a few of my close friends, Dave and Amy - who had also gone to the Chicago shows. We toasted Jerry and toasted "friends".

There was a candelight vigil at one of the local live music bars in their parking lot. All of my friends were there. Folks I have been going to shows with since 1988. We traded stories of the shows and shared more than a few laughs. It was wonderful. Jerry would have wanted it that way.

I have some good photos of the band and Jerry from last fall's shoreline shows on my web page ( I will scan up some more from the Chicago shows and post them in the comming days.

-keep the faith

Colin Lamb

Where were you?

From: [jalst 44] at [] (John A Lescisin)
Date: 9 Aug 1995 22:37:55 GMT
Organization: University of Pittsburgh

It was very weird when I found out. I had taken my SO to the doctor's early this morning. I got home around 2PM...the nmswering machine was blinking like crazy. All the messages were either hang-ups or messages from friends. The weird thing was everyone that left a message for me sounded very upset, but they wouldn't say what was bothering them...they just said "Call me right away, I have some really bad news." By the second message, I knew. I said to my girlfried, "Oh my God...I bet Jerry died or something." She laughed and said "no"...then the third message, then the fourth...all the same thing. The first person I called back wasn't home. It was terrible! This period of 2 or 3 minutes of knowing something awful had happened, but not knowing for sure what it was! Finally, I got in touch with a friend at work, and he told me.

I didn't know how to react...I still don't. Man, it's so tough! Up and down and numb and up and down and numb... I don't know what to feel, what to say...

Love each other,


Where were you?

From: [P--in--s] at [] (Perry Hines)
Date: Fri, 11 Aug 1995 00:32:29 GMT
Organization: Netcom

I was riding my bike up Mt. Tabor ( a beautiful, automobile-free, hillside park in here in Portland) when I heard the horrible news on my Walkman. I continued to the top where I saw a solitary Head standing at one of the many vistas overlooking Stumptown. He was standing there playing his guitar and plaintively singing "Bird Song". I stopped to listen and he played on, oblivious to the fact that I was even there .He was pickin it as clean and singing as sweet (almost) as Jerry. I had handled it until then and as I pedaled down the mountain I could only think:

Don't cry now Dry your eyes on the wind.

I spent the rest of the day listening to my favorite tapes and CD's gleaning new meaning from lyrics I had listened to for more than 23 years but none hit me like that brother's rendition of "BS".



Where were you?

From: [p--e--e] at [] (PeaceLise)
Date: 11 Aug 1995 06:28:02 -0400

I was walking in to work and the guy who sells me coffee every morning said, "You like the Grateful Dead, right?" and I said "Yeah" and he said "Well Jerry Garcia died this morning." I didn't believe it, I thought it was one of those nasty rumors and I didn't know how to react so I just looked right at him and said "Well I'm going to have to go get some more information on that." I ran to my office and turned on the radio, and every single station was playing the Dead. So I started crying very hard, and got up and walked out, and I haven't been back yet. It's nice though, I hadn't realized how many people at work realized I was a Deadhead but they've all left messages on my voice mail. And of course the phone has been ringing off the hook since yesterday, when I'm not on it calling someone else. I've been to the Polo Fields and the Haight a few times, hugged some brothers and sisters, and sung some songs, but I feel like I'm getting sadder every minute. I never realized how huge a part of my life the Dead is, how much they have changed me and set me free. I can't believe there will never be another show with Jerry up there pickin' away, floating on top of Phil and Bobby, then climbing higher and higher, always reaching up with spirals and spider webs and iridescent flower petals swirling in wind, until he crested the peak and we rode down the other side with him... He has a way of playing where I never realized how high he had taken me until he came down the other side. I had to remind myself to breathe.

I miss you so much, Jerry. You gave me the purest bliss I have ever experienced, and nothing is the same without you. Thank you so much for everything you gave us--the music, the family, the freedom.

Sleep in the stars…

  • Fare you well, fare you well
  • I love you more than words can tell
  • Listen to the river sing sweet songs
  • To rock my soul

I hope everybody that is able comes to San Francisco to mourn with us. I saw all the other gatherings on the news, and it's really beautiful that it's happening across the country. I just feel the need for a huge gathering of people, and I hope it happens here... We shared his music together, and we can share our sorrow together.

Peace, love and music--

from a Peace Corps Volunteer in Ukraine

From: Tom Lemley <[t--m] at []>
Date: 10 Aug 1995 14:15:35 GMT

It was 7:30 this morning, Ukraine time, when Tom Brokaw broke the bad news. I didn't think the death of someone I never met could feel much like losing a close friend. Like most of us, I was just another body in the audience, swaying to Broke Down Palace or feeling the hair on the back of my neck stand up during Days Between, and having the time of my life. How do we say good bye to times like those? When I first came to Ukraine in January, I missed alot of things I'd gotten used to at home, but with time I realized the only things I really missed were family, friends, and getting together with all of you for a few shows each year. At any rate, I'm feeling a little isolated right now and it would be great to hear from some of you. I don't get dead flames, but you can email me here. My mailing address is:

290058 Lviv-58
a/c 6801
Tom Lemley

Thanks, take care and I look forward to hearing from you.

Best regards

Tom Lemley

message from Bill Graham's Rabbi

From: Marc Blaker <[blaker m] at []>
Date: 10 Aug 1995 23:30:09 GMT
Organization: Stanford Health Services

I was asked to pass on this message from Bill Graham's Rabbi:

Jerry was a vessel of light and inspiration for many. He was looked upon as the "Zaide" (grandfather) of the rock and roll scene and gave a lost generation a sense of family and belonging.

Our blessings of comfort and consulation go out to his family and his extended family.

Any soul in need of consul or a hot bowl of chicken soup with all the trimmings at our open house "Grateful Yid Shabbos Table", please call.

Rabbi Yosef Langer
Chabad House of San Francisco
Bill Graham Menorah Project
(415) 362-6355

Peace and love

Marc Blaker

From the mouths of babes...

From: Mike and Evelyn Patsos <[p--ts--s] at []>
Date: Thu, 10 Aug 1995 20:06:47 -0500
Organization: Patsos Family

When I got home at lunch time yesterday, with my wife wiping my eyes, my five year old said "Daddy, don't cry--we can still dance to 'Berfa' and hear his voice sing".

I stopped. We danced and hugged.

There is nothing left to do but smile..........

[p--ts--s] at []

"Once in a while you get shown the light in the strangest of places if you look at it right."--R. Hunter

Goodbye Jerry

From: Uma B Keshavan <[u--r--j] at []>
Date: 10 Aug 1995 16:48:25 GMT
Organization: Worcester Polytechnic Institute

Todd Brown ([b--o--n] at []) wrote:

: I purpose that every year from now on somewhere, someplace, somehow we
: all gather to remember Jerry and to keep our souls in communion.

: Think about it!

Can't think of a better day than Aug. 1.

Should become a national holiday./

If the Governer of MA had his way, it would! He wants all flags half-mast in Massachusetts! Republicans aren't all bad, eh? -:-))

Rango Keshavan


From: Ted Koch <[t--dh--d] at []>
Date: 10 Aug 1995 01:44:48 GMT

I saw The Dead the day Bob Marley died. They played Estimated Prophet. It's being played again today. A part of my youth died today. I was driving home from Providence, RI and I did alright until they played Ripple. I'm thankful that my memories of Jerry will always be live.

Thank You, Jerry . . .

From: Alfred A. Hambidge, Jr. <[h--bi--e] at []>
Date: 10 Aug 1995 17:27:26 GMT
Organization: Bristol-Myers Squibb

    For helping me learn how to Listen,
    	use my Imagination,
    	   and feel free to create from the Heart.

    For the sense of Wonder, Awe, and Joy those countless times.

    For being there when there was nobody else,
    	or everybody else -
    	 "If you get confused, just listen to the music play"

    For helping me feel a sense of Community,
    	that I Belonged somewhere.

    It's been awhile since we've been in the same room together.
    Too long.
    Sometimes we drift off, to follow our own path-
    	"There is a road, no simple highway
    	 Between the dawn and the dark of night
    	 And if you go, no one may follow
    	 That path is for, your steps alone."
    And our paths may cross less often.

    But there was always a place to go,
     to get away
    	when the road got bumpy and uncertain, and
    	   I needed help to clear the fog.
    	     And numb the pain.	
     	Or to keep from bursting with happiness, like
    	   those times dancing with my infant children
    	     in my arms.

    Thank you, Captain, for the Gifts you gave us All.

    'Till we meet again,


Where were you?

From: Dancin' Bear <[g--o] at []>
Date: Fri, 11 Aug 1995 14:01:06 GMT

Rob Caffey <[c--ff--y] at []> wrote:

>Where were you when you found out?

At school, of all places, no one wanted to tell me cuz they knew my deep devotion to the Dead. My teacher told me to leave, so that I did, went to a place that has Weizen Berry on tap and cried in my beer until my friends from Seattle showed up to attend the vigil in Portland. (I am not a drinker...)

I miss you Jerry. I guess my baby son Jerry will have someone to rock him to sleep in heaven.


Dancin' Bear

Where were you?

From: Jimbo <[j m cvey] at []>
Date: 12 Aug 1995 09:00:14 -0400

Mr. Lightbulbs <[m--c--y] at []> wrote:

>>I just wish I could have had some people like all of you around to
>>share my pain with :-(

You do! We're right here.

>What is interesting about it
>is they (the nonheads) are acknowledging that something which they don't
>understand is real, and important to others.

Yeah, I found this to be really cool. The one thing that really sticks with me right now is my mom's reaction. She used to really hate the Dead and everything about them. We used to get into arguments about them all the time. Over the years, she learned to accept them, but she still never really "got it". But she called me at work the other morning. She just kept saying how really, really sorry she was, that she knew how much Jer meant to me, I must feel like I lost one of the family, how it was such a shame that Jerry's not around anymore, because he made so many people so happy, that it's a great loss for the world, etc. She sounded like she was about to cry. Maybe she actually "got it" a little more than I give her credit for.

Thanks, Mom. :-)

Jim "Mama, Mama many worlds I've come since I first left home" McVey

The Family Is Still As One

From: Wineluvr <[w--el--r] at []>
Date: Thu, 10 Aug 1995 13:17:39 -400

The Family was formed by the time I got there
at Monterray in '67;
they kindly took me in
and kindled my images of Heaven.
My bus they painted in youthful colors
All reds and greens and violets, and
I suppose, some others.
I wore some tiedyes across my back,
A band across my forehead;
It took a lifetime to shape that instant,
For me to join the family,
To understand the Dead.
All I have for Jerry, now
Is poetic heartfel rhymes:
"Thank you, thank you, Jerry...
For all the good times."

Rodney Barken

Do Not Stand at My Grave and Weep

From: Dire Wolf <[d--ew--f] at []>
Date: Fri, 11 Aug 95 06:43:47 PDT
Organization: Long Island Internet HQ/Point Blank BBS LTD.

Distributed at the Zen Trickster's show, Aug 10, 1995 in Huntington, NY.

Do not stand at my grave and weep;
I am not there, I do not sleep.

I am a thousand winds that blow;
I am the diamond glints on snow.
I am the sunlight on ripened grain;
I am the gentle autumn's rain.

When you awaken in the morning's hush,
I am the swift uplifting rush
Of quiet birds in circled flight.
I am the soft star that shines at night.

Do not stand at my grave and cry.
I am not there;
I did not die.

Wall Street shut down

From: Noel Cook <[C--K] at []>
Date: 11 Aug 1995 16:02:12 GMT
Organization: Berkeley dead-flames to USENET Gateway

The stories about the computer system going down on Wall Street, I believe, are related to what happened at my company. We were mentioned in the USA Today in the Jerry article on page D1. What we do is provide a database of financial information to Wall Street types who use our data in making investment decisions. We also provide a news service which has scrolling headlines that come out throughout the day. When the news about Jerry came across the computer everyone tried to pull the story up at the same time. When this happens it freezes the entire database for our users. I wasn't even able to pull the story up (the same thing happened when John Candy passed away). It was a really weird scene because everyone at the office knows I'm a head and I noticed everyone staring at me waiting for a reaction. I took an early lunch that day. Peace to you all............Noel

I was reading the grateful words and started crying at the computer lab at school, WMU in Kalamazoo. I was only able to go to three shows, but that's better than nothing. I'm sad that i'll never be able to go with my brother and many of my friends who never got the chance...I've felt very alone for the past month or so...I know other heads are in k-zoo, but they are hard to come by. I was planning to go on tour after i graduated from college..all i can say is that i'm grateful to have known jerry, even if it was only briefly, but he'll stay in my heart forever.

a box of rain will ease the pain
and love will see you through

bluestar <[program director] at []>

Full Text of Hunter Eulogy for Jerry

From: PeaceLise <[p--e--e] at []>
Date: 12 Aug 1995 14:56:11 -0400

For all those who don't have access to the Web, here is the full text of the eulogy Robert Hunter read at Jerry's funeral. I got it from the Addicted to Noise site.

An Elegy for Jerry

Jerry, my friend,
you've done it again,
even in your silence
the familiar pressure
comes to bear, demanding
I pull words from the air
with only this morning
and part of the afternoon
to compose an ode worthy
of one so particular
about every turn of phrase,
demanding it hit home
in a thousand ways
before making it his own,
and this I can't do alone.
Now that the singer is gone,
where shall I go for the song?

Without your melody and tase
to lend an attitude of grace
a lyric is an orphan thing,
a hive with neither honey's taste
nor power to truly sting.

What choice have I but to dare and
call your muse who thought to rest
out of the thin blue air
that out of the field of shared time,
a line or two might chance to shine --

As ever when we called,
in hope if not in words,
the muse descends.

How should she desert us now?
Scars of battle on her brow,
bedraggled feathers on her wings,
and yet she sings, she sings!

May she bear thee to thy rest,
the ancient bower of flowers
beyond the solitude of days,
the tyranny of hours--
the wreath of shining laurel lie
upon your shaggy head
bestowing power to play the lyre
to legions of the dead

If some part of that music
is heard in deepest dream,
or on some breeze of Summer
a snatch of golden theme,
we'll know you live inside us
with love that never parts
our good old Jack O'Diamonds
become the King of Hearts.

I feel your silent laughter
at sentiments so bold
that dare to step across the line
to tell what must be told,
so I'll just say I love you,
which I never said before
and let it go at that old friend
the rest you may ignore.


From: Melissa Butler <[m w b] at []>
Date: 14 Aug 1995 22:21:19 GMT

It's been 5 days since the news of Jerry's passing, and I'm still crying. I was travelling on business in South Florida all last week, w/ co-workers who didn't even know I was into the Dead. I got the news enroute to a field site I was going to (again, for work). I nearly broke down right there, on I-95. I had no one to hug, no one close by who understood the grief I was feeling. For Wednesday, and the rest of the week all I wanted to do was leave Florida and go home, where I could be w/ my tapes,my music, my misery.

I didn't get back home to NC until late Friday night. My hubbie was out of town all weekend. All my dead-head friends live out of town. I cried and listened to music all weekend, by myself. The first thing I did was put on my favorite Jerry CD, Reflections. The tears started pouring out, and haven't stopped. Such a sweet They Love Each Other, you can see, that it's true... God, I miss him. Today, on the way to the office, I was listening to JGB, and listening to Jerry sing 'I Shall Be Released' was too much for me. I lost it again. I'm trying hard to think of the good times and gifts he gave me (us), but when will the hurt stop? This is all affecting me far more than I had ever imagined it would.

Life as I knew it will never be the same. I feel utterly lost.



Jerry Tribute in Ernie Pook's Comeek

From: Kingfish <[k--gf--h] at []>
Date: 6 Sep 1995 00:15:30 -0400

"Ernie Pook's Comeek" is an 'alternative' comic strip by Lynda Barry that runs in papers like the Village Voice and Philadelphia's City Paper. It's set in the late sixties, but you can guess who this week's strip was about. The narrator is a junior-high aged girl named Marlys, travelling with her foster parents, her older sister Maybonne, and younger brother Freddie. Driving past scenic views of the park, the narration goes like this: (reprinted without permission)

"It was the nighttime guy on the radio who said it. We were all in the car after one whole day at this incredible park made by the ancientness of glaciers, and they kept on playing my sister's favorite band on a radio station that isn't normal for us.

Four songs of it all in a row and my sister says that's the best radio station she's ever heard and if only we could get that station where we lived. She was sad, because it was already starting to crackle out. My brother Freddie was asleep, but he woke up after the radio guy made the announcement and my sister started crying.

The guy that was just singing died, said the radio announcer, and then his voice was all fading, and then the radio station was gone. My sister has all their records, and the dream of her life was to go to one of their shows, because there is natural love there. She told Freddie it was like if you turned on the radio and the real Santa was dead. Peace Santa. Love Santa

My sister kept crying and I thought it was weird that Freddie started talking about the glaciers. How they changed everything. How there could have been a Peace Glacier, and a Love Glacier that melted and left a beautiful place, a gorgeous place like where we were, then he reached over the back seat and got the rock he carried all day, and gave it to Maybonne as a present for her sadness."

the death of heaven's golden son

From: ?
Date: 04:35 9/29/97

    • you are
    • missed
    • blessed
    • loved
    • rare,
    • too beautiful to live
    • a symbol
    • now a martyr
    • to a cause that should never need be
    • good night Jerry
    • sleep the sleep of the beautiful few.