Mimsy Were the Borogoves

Editorials: Where I rant to the wall about politics. And sometimes the wall rants back.

“I might be in Colorado…”

Jerry Stratton, November 10, 2011

photo for “I might be Colorado…”

January? 2002? WTF?

It’s been a long time since I’ve traveled on a trip short enough not to have checked bags. Normally, if I’m going on a short trip, I drive, because the hassle of flying isn’t worth it.

It is a pain in the ass to pack without checked bags. No toothpaste, no aftershave, no deodorant. They’re all above 3.4 ounces. My travel nail clipper set? The TSA prohibited items page doesn’t mention them. Leave them.

No water, unless I buy it at the airport, but since I’m going to have to hit the local supermarket for deodorant, toothpaste, and aftershave, might as well wait to get water, too. If I’m lucky the hotel will provide it.

Over-the-counter vitamin pills. Nothing on the TSA site about them. Apparently they’re fine and still cause trouble. I’m not taking the entire container for a three-day trip. Into a plastic bag they go, and hope there’s no trouble over them.

Safety razor, prohibited. Does this include my Atra? The list is unclear. Disposable razors and their cartridges are okay, but what about the disposable cartridges of non-disposable razors? Well, in it goes, and hope for the best.

Thought I’d bring a flag pin, too. It’s Veteran’s Day on Friday, and I have a flag pin that I got at my grandfather’s funeral; he was a WWII vet. It’s just a cheap lapel pin, nothing special, except that it is the flag pin I got at my grandfather’s funeral. I don’t want to have to dump it. Four-inch metal blades on scissors are apparently okay, but smaller knives and razor blades are not. That’s a weird one. But also a digression. Do I risk the flag pin? I’ll bring it in the bag along with the note that came with it, and hope.

I’m sure everything’s fine, except… not absolutely sure.

So I guess the Glock is out of the question.

Update: made it to the airport without a problem.

It helped that I made great time. Left the office without “meeting Lumbergh”. Ran into no traffic on the way to the park-and-ride, and because I got here faster than I expected there was literally no line for security. I thought I was in the wrong place.

Then when I looked at the time at the gate, I thought I was here at the wrong time. Then I looked at the date and realized the clock was wrong. Fortunately, modern navigation doesn’t rely on knowing the right time, month, or season…

In response to BlogCon 2011: Are you ready for that? Checking into a Denver hotel under a phony name with intent to commit capital fraud and a head full of acid? I sure hope so.

  1. Good morning! ->